The Book of Flemser

Hello there, bubala - come sit for a spell,

I got stories to share, with some warnings to tell. I'm Aunt Flemser and my kids are absurd,

More boys than I can count - maybe you heard?

My boys are meshugenah - all are quite crazy,

Though some are just boring, and some downright lazy.

They twerked in public, they danced on the grates,

One crossed his eyes... not the worst of their fates.

A mullet? A cube? A kvetcher full-time -

With every disaster, I just drank more wine.

So listen up, kinder, don't roll your eyes,

This book's full of warnings, some wisdom, no lies!

If you value your tuchus and treat your mother with care,

And always get dressed with clean underwear,

These tales will help you, they'll give you an edge,

So you're not like my sons - this much I can pledge.

For parents, for bubbes, for kids big and small,

These tales of Uncle Flemser have a lesson for all.

So come read my story for a laugh or a cry,

And go bring your mother a pastrami on rye.