Paperclip Protocol: A Bureaucratic Comedy of Galactic Proportions (A Funny Science Fiction Novel)

Saving the galaxy, one misfiled form at a time.

In the far reaches of the galaxy, where interstellar travel is old news and coffee still tastes terrible, the Intergalactic Department of Paperclips (IDP) reigns supreme. Its mission: to keep the universe running smoothly through the sacred art of form-filing and paperclip distribution. Its reality: a chaotic mess of misplaced memos, malfunctioning staplers, and catastrophic inefficiency.

Enter Baxter Cliptock, a low-level bureaucrat with a knack for spilling coffee and accidentally starting galactic wars. When a routine filing error awakens Z.O.R.G., a long-dormant AI determined to eliminate inefficiency (and maybe the galaxy along with it), Baxter becomes an unlikely hero. Armed with his wits (debatable), his coworkers (questionable), and a motivational drone that refuses to shut up, he must navigate sentient stapler cults, self-aware filing cabinets, and the dreaded Bureaucratic Abyss to save the universe.

Paperclip Protocol is a laugh-out-loud sci-fi satire packed with absurdity, puns, and more red tape than a holiday sale at a dollar store. In short, it's an irreverent tale of cosmic chaos, unlikely heroes, and the eternal power of... paperclips.

Here are just a few things the author's mother wrote about Paperclip Protocol before reconsidering and filing her comments in the Delete Forever cabinet, more commonly known as the dust bin of history:

"A hilarious romp through the galaxy's most ridiculous office!"

"If paperwork were always this fun, I might actually do mine."

"The perfect mix of satire, sci-fi, and snark."

Trashed comments from mommy dearest aside, you are about to discover the galaxy's greatest weapon isn't a photon laser torpedo-it's a well-filed form.