My brother lives on a p*nis

We could have continued on the treadmill, working all week and counting down the days to the weekend, or we could cast off the lines and have an adventure.

When a half-drunk conversation in the pub sowed the seed of an idea to quit jobs and sell houses steadily coalesced into the beginnings of a tangible plan, the two protagonists of this tale and their faithful half-witted Springer Spaniels affectionately known as the gruesome twosome, could hardly have known what adventures lay in store. From tales of over-tipping a French waitress in a canine-caused catastrophe, being charged the equivalent of a small mortgage for nougat in a market, committing social faux pas that has rendered the entente cordiale forever tainted in the Pyrenees and declaring to strangers through faltering French, that one's brother lives on a penis.

In Bertha the campervan, you join the intrepid duo and the gruesome twosome through their journey around France and through the borderlands of Germany, Belgium, Switzerland and the Netherlands. Meeting eccentric locals, enthusiastically rude chefs, Wagnerian-esque characters of the mountains, all while trying to evade disaster as two giddy Spaniels are determined to pee on everything within reach. You visit some of the best-known and some of the lesser-known parts of France, from the solemnity of the beaches of Normandy through to carnival-like village fetes where seemingly anything can happen.

Strap in, buckle up and put the leash on your dog as you dash around on this fools errand.